July 22, 2013


Wednesday night came around and Eden was ready to laser tag it up with friends. Lively chatter filled the car on their way to the Trafalga Fun Center in Lehi and in any lull in conversation, you could hear Eden quietly shooting finger lasers at each passenger.

"Pew. Pew pew pew," she pewed.

Renae turned into the fun center's parking garage. Suddenly, all happiness and laughter ceased as uneasiness and fear settled into the hearts of the seven friends. They entered the Azkaban of all parking garages. While Renae turned a corner, looking for an empty space, Eden clutched Ariel and Eric's kneecaps, positive that at any moment, dementors would swoop in to steal her soul. No light fixtures were lit and after close examination, it appeared there weren't even light fixtures at all. The glow of the setting sun shone sparingly through the windows, if that's what you call the slits in the walls.

"At least there aren't any dead bodies, right?" Randi said. The friends all chuckled nervously as they left the car.

Randi spoke too soon. As they emerged from the dark shadows to a less shadowy area of the garage, Eden saw a body on the floor. Her heart stopped, then started again, beating five times faster than a regular day's worth of cardio.

The body moved.

A zombie? Eden's seen "World War Z." A bitten human can change in 12 seconds. She hated running, but this was a moment when her flight or fight instinct kicked in hardcore.

My flight or fight face.

Just as Eden was about take off, the body looked up and she realized what they were looking at. It was just one of those emo kids that exists in every junior high. She (or he...it was always hard to tell) was just being emo and introspective whilst another emo child was looking on. The Trafalga Fun Center parking garage seemed a proper setting for the youths of the night.

The group of friends emerged from the darkness and into the sun. Lee ran out ahead of them all, trying to bring life back into the group, but energy was quickly sucked away when they realized that laser tag, the purpose of their trip, was booked for the rest of the night.

Oh well, at least there were rides and mini golf and stuff. So they waited in line for their Pass of All Passes. For 45 minutes.

In that time, Randi, Renae and Michelle waited in line for those water boat things that shoot water. By the time the rest of the group joined, the line was an hour long. As was the line for go-kart.

And mini-golf was out of golf balls.

And Eden was starting to crave chicken fingers. Quickly, in order to feed her demanding stomach, she suggested to the group they go to Ikea to eat. Everyone liked that idea. They headed back to the mouth of hell.

Renae bravely peeked into the garage and motioned for the group to follow. They scurried over to the general area where she had parked, but, after wasting so much time in the germ infested Trafalga, sunlight was sparse and each member found themselves unable to see.

"Where's the car?" someone asked.

"There! Up ahead!" There was a glint in the distance. Everyone walked towards the small gleam of light, but not before hearing snarling. Eden looked back towards the mouth of the garage and saw that one of the emo kids was biting the other. He/she looked up and locked eyes with Eden. And that was when she realized, the undead were finally here.

"Ahhh! Zombies! Run!" Everyone screamed and sprinted for the car. Renae fumbled for her keys, Ariel tripped over her own feet, Eden slapped Michelle with one of her flailing arms, Randi screamed and Lee and Eric were behind, pushing the girls in hopes to get them all quickly to car. They piled into the car and Renae shoved the key into the ignition, starting the engine. The emo boy/girl jumped onto the trunk and Renae reversed the car into one of the walls.

It was super effective and the zombie child died. The other bitten child started twitching, but by that time, the group of friends were out the garage.

The car ride to Ikea was quiet as everyone, gasping for air, wiped sweat from their brows. This trip will not be wasted, everyone thought. And they made it to the Swedish furniture store, ready to consume their famous meatballs and, for Eden, their great chicken fingers.

As they walked into Ikea, lights started turning off. A voice from above said, "Ikea customers. The store will close in 5 minutes. Please bring your items to the checkout area."

"Noooooooooo!" Eden fell to her knees. "WHYYYY!" She dropped her head into her hands and started to sob.

"Ikea customers. The store will close in 5 minutes. Please bri--" The PA system cut out and the lights started flickering. Behind them, they heard snarling and they knew...they knew the other emo kid/zombie followed them there. And he/she bit others along the way. The seven friends turned and saw a mob of zombies approaching the store. Someone whimpered.

This was it and the friends acknowledged it. All they wanted to do was play laser tag at Trafalga, but they were probably going to die tonight. They each grabbed the closest piece of furniture to arm themselves and headed towards the zombies.

Die, zombies, die.


Ha. Trafalga Fun Center. More like the Trafalga Dumb Center. (Oooh, oooh buuurn.) Anyway, it's been a while since I've "fan fictioned" my life. In fact, in that same car ride, I discovered that was what people liked best from my blog. So I'm going to try and do that more often.

Everything but the zombie parts was true. It was a horrid trip. But they were all good sports about it. I really did just want laser tag and chicken fingers.

On another note about my life: I'm being published by the school paper, The Universe (pretentious? yes.)

Here's a song for you today.

Have a good day, my friends.